When things are going well, I find I have less to say. I'm not so sardonic and witty. So let's allow Good Ol' Tuolumne County to do the talking today with the Latest Greatest Hits from the Police Blotter:
12:51 a.m., Sonora area — A man said his girlfriend was drunk and annoying him on the 16100 block of Tuolumne Road. The man was told that being annoying and drunk in one’s own home is not a criminal offense.
1:13 a.m., Sonora — A drunk man apparently stumbled out into the road on the 90 block of South Washington Street and approached the driver’s side of a van and attempted to lean into the window but it was up. The man bounced off the vehicle and fell as the driver was driving away, and his foot was struck by the van’s rear tire.
4:23 a.m., East Sonora — A man on the 14100 block of Tuolumne Road said he heard voices under his residence and his dog was growling. While the area was being checked, a neighbor said someone had rung her door bell.
10:22 a.m., Columbia — A man on Quarry Road said he let his son use his vehicle but the son traded it for drugs and the dealers won’t return the vehicle.
12:47 p.m., Twain Harte — A man said after he yelled at another driver for “driving crazy” on Twain Harte Drive, the other driver cut his vehicle off to make him stop, hit him in the face and ripped his shirt off. The first man said he then used pepper spray on the other driver and on a second person who was with him.
1:23 p.m., suspicious circumstances — A “crazy” woman in a Def Leppard shirt was allegedly harassing employees and customers at a grocery store on the 1200 block of Sanguinetti Road. She washed her hair in the bathroom sink and “became very angry” when employees would not give her a free flu shot.
3:54 p.m., Tuolumne — The assistant principal at Summerville Elementary School said a sixth-grader pulled out a six-inch knife after school, which caused several students to run home.
5:15 p.m., Don Pedro — A woman on the 14300 block of Las Palmas Way said her neighbor tried to run her over and on a prior occasion hid in the bushes and threw a rock at her dog’s head.
6:57 p.m., Sonora — Three goats and a goose were in the roadway on Racetrack Road at Rough and Ready Trail.
8:01 p.m., Jamestown — A man said another man repeatedly gives his sister alcohol at the nursing home where she lives on the 18700 block of Highway 108.
8:32 p.m., Tuolumne — A couple was arguing on the 18500 block of Carter Street and shredding old Valentine’s Day cards.
And this week's absolute, hands-down winner:
2:39 a.m., Columbia — Responding to a call about a prowler on the 11400 block of Jackson Street, deputies found a disoriented naked man who said he was going to a “Boy Scout jubilee.” He was arrested on suspicion of public intoxication.
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What can I say? These pictures are awesome.